父母们可能意识不到，他们处理孩子之间的争斗的方式有可能导致事情向他们希望的相反的方向发展。当他们给其中一个孩子贴上“欺凌者”的标签时，另一个孩子就会学会如何通过成为“受害者”而显示自己的特别。父母通常看不到“受害者”是如何引发争斗的。不介入争斗与放任不管不是一回事。偶尔会有一些成年人想起当年自己的父母把他们丢给暴力的兄弟姐妹放任不管的情形。这不是我们提倡的。父母有责任教孩子知道伤害别人是不对的。
Parents may not realize that the way they handle their children"s fights can lead to things going in the opposite direction they want. When they label one child a bully, the other learns how to be special by being a victim. Parents often don"t see how the "victim" starts the fight. Staying out of a fight is not the same thing as leaving it alone. Occasionally, some adults remember when their parents left them to their violent siblings. That"s not what we"re advocating. Parents have a duty to teach children that it is wrong to hurt others.
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